You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but sometimes, playing a poor hand well.

I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet.

The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.

I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet.

If cash comes with fame, come fame; if cash comes without fame, come cash.

Darn the wheel of the world! Why must it continually turn over? Where is the reverse gear?

There is an ecstasy that marks the summit of life, and beyond which life cannot rise. And such is the paradox of living, this ecstasy comes when one is most alive, and it comes as a complete forgetfulness that one is alive.

Affluence means influence.

One cannot violate the promptings of one's nature without having that nature recoil upon itself.

The scab is a traitor to his God, his mother, and his class.

Life is so short. I would rather sing one song than interpret the thousand.

San Francisco is gone. Nothing remains of it but memories.

I write for no other purpose than to add to the beauty that now belongs to me. I write a book for no other reason than to add three or four hundred acres to my magnificent estate.

I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough.

I was born nine months premature.

I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.

I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?