If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less.

There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money.

I guess if people couldn't profit from war I don't think there would be war.

We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company.

Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?

Creating characters is just another way to express a type and put that type to use.

I especially love 'Web Therapy' and I did 'Eastbound and Down' too. I had a lot of fun doing that.

I guess that's one of the reasons that you do it - work all the time - because it's sort of a high to find something that really works.

I was always drawn to more the social-expression-of-culture types.

If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed.

It's my belief we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.

Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.

We are all in this together, by ourselves.

We're all in this alone.

What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.

What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring.

What is reality, anyway? Just a collective hunch.

You know being relevant or coming up with something interesting, funny to say about what's current is just as hard as it might ever be depending on the serendipity of it all.