Steven Wright's Profile
Brief about Steven Wright: By info that we know Steven Wright was born at 1955-12-06. And also Steven Wright is American Comedian.Steven Wright's quotation" section for more.
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.Tags: Car, Gone, Stop
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'Tags: Good, Mistakes, Morning
I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.Tags: Future, Off, Side
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.Tags: Car, Home, Leave
I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.Tags: Car, Friend, Friends
I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world... perhaps you've seen it.Tags: Keep, Perhaps, Seen
I like to reminisce with people I don't know.Tags: Reminisce
If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?Tags: Happen, Light, Turn
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?Tags: Asked, Washington, Whipped
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.Tags: Missing, Tired, Weather
I live on a one-way street that's also a dead end. I'm not sure how I got there.Tags: Dead, End, Sure
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