Benny Hill's Quotes

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Do unto others, then run.

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.

That's what show business is, sincere insincerity.

I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be.

Those hot pants of hers were so damned tight, I could hardly breathe.

I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.

The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb.

And I'm walking along and we're laughing, kidding, joking, and see he understood the leader, the one we called the leader, had some knowledge of English, although limited.

And that's how I wrote to NICAP, but then later, just very soon after that, like three weeks later, we started getting phone calls from government agents.

And we turned off and 30 miles south they're standing in the middle of our road blocking our way, stopped the car, got out, took us through the path in the woods, where the craft was on the ground.

I mean you might say he had a travelling post office, but also Barney was very, very active. He was a legal officer for the NAACP and they had a lot of problems after Pease.

I was single for six years and during those six years I went back to college and got my degree in Social Work and then... while I was single... Barney came here to Portsmouth on vacation.

In fact, if you have a crime committed against you, and you go to have hypnosis, you can't testify. Because there's no way to test what is real, what's fact, what's fantasy.

So it's sheer terror, but then, this is the whole reason that we went so long to Doctor Simons, was to get rid of all these... mixed feelings that we had.

They came out over the highway and they stopped and that's when Barney got out, with the binoculars to try and identify the craft. I mean, he'd been in the military in World War Two, he's puzzled.

So that they can actually make it known to the American people before they vote what they're voting for.

15 minutes will open up the amnesia and you'll have full recall.

A week or so ago I did a two hour book review in Baltimore Maryland.

Actually, actually, when he first put us into hypnosis, he didn't know what he was going to get.

And then I went to the University of New Hampshire for two years, and then the war came along.

And there was huge numbers of UFOs around my parents home in Kingston.

By the time we went to Doctor Simon I think Barney had been totally disabled for at least six months.