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Sarah Silverman's Quotes

Sarah Silverman profile photo

Born: 1970-12-02
Profession: Comedian
Nation: American
Biography of Sarah Silverman

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The first time I did stand-up was the summer I was 17.

Tags: Summer, Time

Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist.

Tags: Afraid, Funny, Harsh

What are the chances there is a God, really?

Tags: Chances, God

When I came out to L. A., I got a part in an episode of 'Star Trek: Voyager,' and I hired an acting coach.

Tags: Acting, Coach, Star

You know, I think whatever a comic talks about onstage is all they talk about offstage.

Tags: Comic, Talk, Whatever

And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major to arts and sciences, and my dad cut a deal with me: He said if I'd quit school he'd pay my rent for the next three years, as if I were in school.

Tags: Change, Dad, School

I can't believe how much time has passed. The first time I did stand-up I was 17, and I was really a stand-up once I was 19 in New York, and now I'm 41, and I still feel like I haven't found myself onstage.

Tags: Found, Once, Time

I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion.

Tags: Funny, Mean, Religion

I'm a very ritualistic person. I have to wash my face twice, and on the second wash before I rinse, I brush my teeth, then I rinse, then I floss, then I put on moisturizer. I'm ritualistic. Jewishness is very ritualistic.

Tags: Face, Put, Second

I'm doing a lot of stand-up, but not like when you're living in New York and you can do three sets a night and it's your life, and you sleep all day and you wake up and you eat with a bunch of other comics and then get ready for the night.

Tags: Life, Night, Sleep

I don't set out to offend or shock, but I also don't do anything to avoid it.

Tags: Avoid, Offend, Shock

It shows the truth - that the real meaning of a word is only as powerful or harmless as the emotion behind it.

Tags: Powerful, Real, Truth

I mean, I love being with friends and I love kissing and loving someone to pieces. But it's hard to find someone who doesn't ultimately start judging you and your choices.

Tags: Hard, Love, Someone

I have a ton of Holocaust stuff, and some of it is really hard core.

Tags: Hard, Holocaust, Stuff

I like my life alone.

Tags: Alone, Life

I'm Jewish, but I'm totally not.

Tags: Jewish, Totally

Men like to squash you. I just want someone who's happy with himself, happy with his life. He doesn't have to squash mine.

Tags: Happy, Life, Men

Relations between black and white would be greatly improved if we were more accepting of our fears and our feelings and more vocal about it.

Tags: Between, Black, Feelings

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

Tags: Fun, Great, Parents

But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.

Tags: Enough, Fun, Funny

By the time I would have graduated, at 22, I was a writer and featured performer on Saturday Night Live.

Tags: Night, Saturday, Time

Earlier in my career, I was really tight, really together, and knew who I was and I was confident. I kind of feel in between now.

Tags: Between, Career, Together

I do love the idea of ritual.

Tags: Idea, Love, Ritual
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I enjoy the last quarter of all basketball games.

Tags: Basketball, Enjoy, Last

I just think of myself as a comedian, really.

Tags: Comedian

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

Tags: Heart, Kissing, Shape

I never want to be in a position where I have to defend my material. It's too subjective. It's for other people to defend or not defend.

Tags: Defend, Material, Position

I really think everything is fair game.

Tags: Fair, Game

I remember when I got a part on 'Seinfeld' it was like an out of body experience, I was so excited.

Tags: Body, Experience, Remember

I still have highs and lows, maybe I don't cry salty tears as much.

Tags: Cry, Maybe, Tears

I'd love to do drama if it was interesting.

Tags: Drama, Love

If I have kids, I'll adopt.

Tags: Adopt, Kids

Smells definitely do have a crazy impact on me.

Tags: Crazy, Definitely, Impact

Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts.

Tags: Facts, Humor

That's not to say that I don't find anything offensive.

Tags: Offensive
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