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Jimmy Kimmel's Quotes

Jimmy Kimmel profile photo

Born: 1967-11-13
Profession: Celebrity
Nation: American
Biography of Jimmy Kimmel

See the gallery for quotes by Jimmy Kimmel. You can to use those 7 images of quotes as a desktop wallpapers.
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You don't need to exorcise your personal demons onstage.

Tags: Demons, Personal

It's funny how all of this has worked out - I wasn't popular in high school, but now every drunken guy in the United States wants to be my pal. They all want to buy me a shot, and pretty soon I'm throwing up.

Tags: Funny, Pretty, School

The truth is, we have this idea that late night is about creativity and being cool, but that's not our job. Our job is to get as many people watching the commercials in between our show. That's the reality of it.

Tags: Cool, Job, Truth

There's an air of mystery around the Masons, but the reality is that they're mostly a bunch of veterans getting drunk in a lodge that they've built to look like a temple. It's just a bunch of guys trying to get away from their wives.

Tags: Drunk, Reality, Trying

When I was on the radio, I used to be able to go a lot farther than I can now. You don't really remember until you're on the radio again, sometimes in your old radio station and sitting with the guys you used to work with and you go, 'Oh yeah, I can't say these things anymore. I'm handcuffed.'

Tags: Old, Remember, Work

Almost every week, someone's mad at me.

Tags: Almost, Mad, Someone

At the Emmys, you've got a bunch of people who are used to being on TV on TV. You don't have that at the Oscars. At the Oscars, you have people who are used to having 40 takes.

Tags: Takes, Tv, Used

I can't be as flip as I once was.

Tags: Flip, Once

I describe myself as a human being.

Tags: Describe, Human

I did not have any delusions of grandeur as a kid.

Tags: Delusions, Grandeur, Kid

I don't really need to be dirty to be funny.

Tags: Dirty, Funny

I go to Costco every weekend. It's my favorite part of the week.

Tags: Favorite, Week, Weekend

I have had a lot of experience in broadcasting.

Tags: Experience

I have like fifteen televisions in my house.

Tags: Fifteen, House

I know there are, like, 12 rules for late night: a desk, a band. Will people take me seriously if I don't wear a tie?

Tags: Night, Rules, Seriously

I never imagined being on television.

Tags: Imagined, Television

I only get unusual ailments.

Tags: Ailments, Unusual

I still love comic books. When you have a kid, that's an excuse to keep reading all the comic books.

Tags: Keep, Love, Reading

I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means.

Tags: Creative, Means, Whatever

I'm a terrible golfer.

Tags: Golfer, Terrible

If I have one criticism of the other late-night shows, it's that they're almost entirely scripted.

Tags: Almost, Criticism, Shows

My aunt and uncle are clearly civilians.

Tags: Aunt, Clearly, Uncle

My definition of cursing is probably different from what other people's definitions are.

Tags: Cursing, Definition
Much more quotes by Jimmy Kimmel below the page.

No matter who it is, I hate to see people losing their jobs. I really do.

Tags: Hate, Losing, Matter

On Letterman and Leno, it always bothers me when they go outside the studio and it's daytime.

Tags: Bothers, Outside, Studio

People's lives are boring.

Tags: Boring, Lives

Real emotion is good - or doing a good job of faking real emotion.

Tags: Good, Job, Real

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.

Tags: Authority, Boss, Funny

When you know someone you can make a little more fun of them without them getting offended.

Tags: Fun, Getting, Someone

You can say Pizza Hut is terrible pizza, but they also sell more pizzas than anybody else.

Tags: Anybody, Else, Terrible